They surround our entire day. If we're not covered in them then we are most likely telling the latest tale about them to our girlfriends over a martini.
Just a warning, there's a
PEE. If you have a baby boy, then you know this tale all too well. I have two boys, and I discovered that I didn't remember the "pee in the eye" rule until it was too late. I left my youngest uncovered during a diaper change for only a fraction of a second and I was hit in the eye. He was talented enough to even hit himself at the same time. Needless to say he hasn't done it again. But Pee is like the horse of different colors. No story is ever the same. My oldest son, otherwise referred to as "the know-it-all," decided to do this the other day:
I'm just cleaning up my mess Momma.
POOP. We all saw the picture I posted a couple of weeks ago. I still don't have the words to explain that one. But at other times, it seems as though I am constantly talking about my child's poop.
Oh, it was a little darker today.
Who let the cork out!?
When did you eat carrots?
And my all time favorite: Did it smell any different?
I have to admit, my husband is really nice about changing the poopy diapers and the wiping of the butts. He obviously complains (who doesn't) but I've never had to ask him twice to change the Poopinator. Here's his first diaper change at the hospital with Mr. Know-it-all:
Okay, I'll give him a little slack. That first poop is always bad. Just another reason to rejoice that I had cesareans and wasn't able to get out of bed for a day.
PUKE. Ahhhh. My favorite. This one isn't much of dinner conversation but it does come up from time to time (yes, that was a bad pun). My first child wasn't much of a puker. The only real time he let it fly was when I introduced him to my boss (at my then job). She jumped back at least two feet and it still hit her. My husband called it disgusting. I called it hilarious.
Now, my youngest, the Poopinator, is also referred to as the Puke Master. Oh yes. This child vomits or spits-up at least twice an hour. I've never seen anything like it. Sometimes it's a little. Sometimes its A LOT. For instance (and those of you faint at heart should not scroll down):
My husband and I call this one "Puke Fest 2011." I survived that